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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If people cannot agree about who gets to stay in the house, the way that it usually works is that they put the house up for sale and split the selling price. Everyone moves somewhere else. If they can agree, the person who stays often buys the person who leaves out of the house.[/quote]

This.  It always amazes me how there's this belief that somehow the person who cheated or just wanted the divorce (for any reason) is supposed to be punished or threatened with a huge financial loss - mostly I suspect as a way of keeping them from leaving an unwilling dumpee.  Sure, the courts will make sure nobody gets left destitute and that children are properly supported (which may include getting the house), but that's done for the children - not as a consolation prize for the person being left.

The way it works is: the marriage is over, the joint assets get divvied up and you go on your way.  It is extraordinarily rare anymore for anyone to be awarded a consolation prize of all the joint assets.  That's a Victorian fantasy.

[quote=Anonymous]Personally, I feel that if she wants to leave the marriage, she should leave the marriage, but I can understand why she doesn't want to do that. It's a pretty sweet set up, getting everything you want and none of the inconvenience.[/quote]

Re-read the original posting..she does want to leave the marriage.

The woman having the affair should insist on a divorce and get a PSA drawn up with a lawyer.  She can force things along by filing while she is still living with him.  If she's got a lick of sense, she will stop seeing the AP lest her hubby decide to hire a PI and photograph them in Flagrante Delicto.[/quote]

PP here. I meant if she wants to leave the marriage, she should leave the marital home.[/quote]

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