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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She is struggling with her loss of identity in two ways:

She's no longer the young pretty one. She's still pretty/ but she's now "pretty for 42." It's a huge hit to your ego.

She's also no longer the mom to young kids. That is a stage that when you're in it feels like you'll never leave it and then one day you realize that as you were living it, day by grueling day, the years past and that stage is done. She's now the mom of elementary kids and as she gets older, they do, and one day they will have their own life and won't want/need her at all.

I know this because I'm not there yet but I get glimpses sometimes and will feel anxiety building. She's entering the second half of her life and that's tough for women who have built an identity around being young, pretty, and a mom of young kids. She very much needs to find a hobby or volunteer cause or job that will give her back her confidence ("I'm good at this too!"), fill her time, and help her forge the identity that will replace the ones she's lost. [/quote]

All of this. She was mommy and had a very important job is taking care of them when they were little. Now they are in school and can probably take care of themselves (the day to day stuff of toilet and feeding and playing- of course they still need parenting). So she was very very needed and depended on and now she's not to the same degree and add to that her looks fading as they do for everyone and it's a recipe for a lot of new insecurity and struggle with identity. 
She needs to find a new her. Be it a job or a volunteer gig or even a serious hobby. Good for you for being supportive. Talk to her about how she sees the next 5 years for example and what she may want to do with the time she has. [/quote]

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