Reply to Relationship with Alcoholic

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Relationship with Alcoholic"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've been in recovery in AA 25 plus years.  Sounds like his sponsor is religious.  Religion is not part of the program.  Finding a power greater than yourself is, because we alcoholics don't have power over our desire to drink.  We drink when we shouldn't and can't predict how much we'll drink.

Don't get married anytime soon.  Go to 6 al-anon meetings, not all the same one.  Ask in the al-anon meeting "Who is a good person for me to talk to?  My fiancé is trying to get sober. ". Nothing wrong with therapy, either.

Your fiancé sounds very manipulative and controlling.  Focus on what are YOUR needs, and are they being met?

FWIW I started going to church after many years and never mention it in meetings.  (People are free to ask me and I'll tell them).  I know people who are Jewish, Muslim, agnostic, Buddhists, Taoists, everything.  AA encourages seeking with an open mind. " God of YOUR understanding."[/quote]

Wedding plans are definitely on hold, we have no date set and aren't even talking about it at this point.  Thank you for the al-anon suggestion. I also feel like sometimes he is using his attempt to get sober to control me, and then guilt me like "If you want me to be sober, you'd do...."

[quote]Finally, please read up on this disease. Before the last relapse, how long had he been sober? Alcoholics are operating with a diseased brain and if he had been actively drinking recently, he is not functioning like a healthy person, even if he looks and sounds like he is. This is not a good place to start a marriage.[/quote]

He had just started going to meetings, he was doing 90 in 90, and I think was closing in on 30 days. And I had to go away for 4 days. And while I was gone, he got drunk, crashed his car and passed out.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics