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[quote=Anonymous]I am a 30 year old female dating a 32 year old male. VERY new relationship, only been dating a couple months. I can definitely see this being long term. I have met most of his friends a couple times and they all seem very nice. 
He is friends with an ex girlfriend who I haven't met yet. They dated for a few years and ended things about 3-4 years ago. They remained friends and talk somewhat regularly. I don't know much about her and haven't asked anything since we're very new still. He acknowledged that its unusual to remain friends with an ex and acknowledged that some people may not be okay with this. 
Historically speaking, (and I'm not just saying this), I've never been a jealous person nor have I ever had any issues with my past boyfriends having female friends. 
The problem is.. I was in a relationship for a year that ended in February.  For the entire year, I had suspicions and doubts about my ex's ex girlfriend / "friend". I never met her but I caught him in several lies regarding her. He kept saying she had mental issues and he was just there for her, etc etc. I saw texts, some of her FB posts etc and I never should have put up with all the lies. There were so many red flags that I ignored but because I had never been through anything like this, and because I was truly in love with him and optimistic, I always believed him. Things came crashing down when I received a message from her. We unpacked the entire year of lies and I was truly truly devastated. I cried for weeks and couldn't believe how stupid I was.  I'm finally starting to move on and gain some rely respect back.

I am completely jumping the gun I realize, especially since we're so new and this friend/ex girlfriend has yet to even make an appearance... But I found myself getting anxious yesterday thinking of it.  I feel crazy, trust me. I can't explain the feeling because it was so out of my comfort zone. I have no reason to worry but just hearing about a female "friend" who is an ex gf gave me some sort of minor PTSD - and I know that sounds dramatic.

Anyways.. I'm not sure what to do or how to reframe my thinking so I don't build this up in my head. Is it possible I'm just not ready to date?[/quote]

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