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[quote=Anonymous]On another thread, a SAHM was saying how annoyed she is that her family members don't seem to respect what she does all day. I think she thinks that they would respect her more if she had a job outside the home. I have no kids, and no dog in the SAHM/WOHM fight, but it sounds really annoying, her family's attitude, and I can see what she'd be irritated by it.

But the s/o part is this question: did you grow up with the expectation that people would "respect" you for whatever happened to take up your time and/or provide your living?

I grew up in a family in which thinking about work and career was partly a matter of practicality, and partly a matter of passion and identity. So I think that there was an expectation that whatever you did, it would be something to be proud of - in addition to something that'd pay your bills. And you'd probably get some public recognition for it - or at least people who know you would understand why you'd chosen this path.

But my husband's family is a whole lot more practical, and less seeking of public acknowledgement. They don't necessarily pursue careers that you'd be "respected" for or whatever - they are just normal jobs that pay the bills, mostly. And some people stay home with kids, which is also completely unremarkable in that family.

I frankly have a hard time even imagining my husband's family members even understanding why anyone would feel respected or disrespected for choosing to stay home with kids, or going out to get a job. It'd mostly be a matter of whether you need the money or not. It would not be respected if someone made a dumb financial choice and then asked their family to bail them out - but even then, it wouldn't be such a big deal. I think standing and status just isn't really as much of an issue in his family.

So, good people of DCUM - I'm curious your thoughts or perspective here. Do you expect "respect" for whatever you do during the day? Does that concept mean anything to you? [/quote]

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