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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thanks for this. 
My kids just don't see any negative qualities in him yet. He is great with them and never said anything remotely negative to them. Now I just tell him he is "busy" when they ask about him. They are all under 10 so I don't know if it is appropriate to tell them what is going on.

Has anyone ended a relationship with a parent/sibling and they actually changed because of it?[/quote]

No, and you will not help yourself by thinking he might.  He is who he is and if you expect him to change you will be disappointed.  That said, after a while you may be able to draw better boundaries - and as long as you stick to them and cut him off when he crosses them, he my learn to check it around you.  I have cut my father out of my life several times.  Every time he crept back it was the same misery.  Now I have kids that he wants to see, and while he hasn't changed one bit he is a little more careful around me, because he knows one false move and he's out.  He is still the same miserable bastard, it just shows more with my brother, who tolerates the bad behavior more than I do.[/quote]

Hmmm I wonder if we have the same father...

Thank you for this. It is a good reminder. Of course now, I feel terrible for cuttin him off. He is a lonely, miserable, old man and I feel guilty cutting him out, but you are right about boundaries.

What did you do, PP? How long until you had this relationship with him. [/quote]

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