Reply to How did you talk to your tween DD re: sex, etc.?

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm not referring to the mechanics of sex; hopefully all kids by this age have learned about that.  I'd like to know how other parents handled the discussion of when sex is appropriate for your families, and your morals.

My daughter is only 11, but she surprised me yesterday by asking how old I was when I first had sex.  I was caught off-guard and really didn't want to discuss my own sexual experiences with her right now; maybe when she's a little older.  But I wish I had been prepared with what I really wanted to say, which was that she should be much older and in a long term relationship with someone she loves - and who loves her. This person should be loyal, kind, and only have her best interests at heart.  She should never be afraid to say no, and if the other person is upset by that, then it's the wrong person.

She should also be emotionally mature enough to plan on having safe sex, always.

Even saying all of that, how many of us actually met all those criteria for our first time?  I came fairly close - waited until college, was with a long term boyfriend, was safe, etc.  But he still turned out to be a scumbag...and I subsequently made some pretty awful choices until I met my now husband.  How much of your own life choices did you share with your young kids when they asked?   Thanks. [/quote]

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