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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]When I was in my twenties, my first love and I broke up in part because of issues surrounding a severe injury I suffered and the possibility that it would lead to a permanent disability. It wasn't explicitly that he broke up with me because of it but he was torn between being young and having fun or being a caretaker and I dealt poorly with being massively insecure about it and took a lot of my anger out on him. In time we both healed and learned a lot. I think we were both fine with chaulking it up to life experience. We were friends for a while afterward, but have not had contact in almost 6 years, because his now-wife was uncomfortable with even the casual, sort of tense friendship we maintained (we have lots of mutual friends and even some that are family friends for both of us, so we were a big part of each other's lives and there was no risk of it becoming romantic again). While I was hurt when his wife cut off our relationship, I understand his family is way more important and I have my own family and life so I haven't thought him in a while. Tonight I just found out that his wife just gave birth to their child several months premature, and that child may have the same lifelong issue that was one of the potential issues I was facing. I don't know why this has hit me so hard but I have been crying all night and I don't even know why. I am so sad for their child and for my ex. I wish I could hug them all right now because it must be hard for them. I am sure he will stick by his family (right?) but I also am having a bunch of weird feelings wishing he could have been mature enough to step up when I needed him, [b]and also fear that he will abandon this baby like he did me[/b], etc. I am not normally a vey emotional person so I dont know why I am feeling this way. This is such a weird situation I don't know who to even talk to about it. So few people really understand what I went through during that time in my life and I'm so different now I don't think a lot of people would even believe it. I'm assuming I can't reach out to even offer support, although I do feel a little tug to. I just need to stay away and mind my own business, right? [/quote]

This part of OP's post is quite troubling. Who even thinks this way? Without even knowing this new dad I am certain that he will not abandon his child. The connection to one's own child is not in any way comparable to a college romance. Please leave these people be OP.[/quote]

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