Reply to I worry he's a narcissist just like my ex.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am dating a guy for a [b]few months[/b]. He's good looking, smart, a gentleman, good job, good-hearted, and good values. He treats me very well, and we seem to mesh so easily. It's been great but I have doubts. My last boyfriend was a narcissist and was just like this in the beginning. I took a year off and met him. We [b]became exclusive quickly[/b], and he [b]always wants to see me[/b]. He doesn't exhibit any bad behavior, but my ex didn't for a few months into our relationship. I really like this guy and [b]he's a guy I would want to marry[/b]. All his friends speak very highly of him. He's never treated me badly. The sex is freakin incredible.

He treats me to [b]fancy dinners[/b] on a whim, and can't stop [b]trying to impress me[/b]. He really supports my future goals ( Pharmacist + have a family). I love it and he seems to be the perfect guy for me. I'm just so afraid that I'm blinded, and I will have another narcissist on my hands. How can I stop worrying about thi, or find out?

From your second post: Sorry for the typos. On my phone and[b] tipsy[/b]! I love him already, but my ex was so eager to lock me down. I see the same with him. He says it's [b]because I'm everything he wants[/b] but it worries me so much.

[/quote]

The red flags are there but there are just as many that are about you as are about him --

You -- drink too much (tipsy and drunk-DCUMing), bad prior relationship with not that much time off and no indication of counseling, focused on unimportant things like looks and money (fancy dinners, being impressed), it's only been a few months and yet you are already thinking you could marry him.

Him -- only been a few months and always wants to see you, is trying to impress you with fancy dinners, etc.

Maybe he is just a nice guy, maybe he is putting on a show until you are hooked.  Either way you need to slow it WAY down.  Have you gotten any counseling post-narcissist?  Why are you allowing this "impress me" dynamic to exist?  Is he just as happy and interested doing un-impressing things like taking a walk or having a picnic?  Is he just as happy to spend time with you when you initiate what the plans are and when they're low key.  Why are you so focused on what his friends say, when you should be talking directly to him?  Have you talked about your previous relationships and his? [/quote]

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