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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]After I wrote this, I read it and realize it reads harsh, but it being and anonymous board and how I actually feel, I am posting it anyway.

Gay man here.  My two cents is that you are perceived as wanting all the perks of being lgbt with none of the challenges that go with it.  Coming out is irreversible.  It was the scariest, but most exciting time of my life.  For nearly all lgbt people it is the same

Since you can always choose to be with a man, coming out for you can be taken back at any time and is not permanent Accordingly we have sharply different experiences and bluntly (and selfishly) I don't want you to experience the perks without the challenges.

It feels a bit like you are trying take from me and my community in a way that even straight people of privilege don't.  And for that reason you will always be an outsider.  We are not the same.

[/quote]

I'm going to offer the Through the Looking Glass version of this view from the POV of a bi person, because I get it. I get that it is different. Bear with me, my head is full of pollen.

We have gotten SO MUCH better about talking to youth who figure out that they are gay than we used to be. However, some of us really and truly fall right smack dab in the middle of that Kinsey spectrum, and keep waiting for that aha moment for one side of the fence or the other that never comes. And, I feel compelled to remind everyone, sexual orientation is not a choice. It's painful to be told you are in a phase or looking for attention or not even real.

However, yes, we are usually able to benefit from all the heteronormative privilege, especially if and when we partner with someone of the opposite gender. Frankly, it's easier. We know what to do. We know how to navigate this. Society teaches us how to do it.  And, it makes us invisible. Folks that have that clear-as-a-bell aha moment when they realize they are gay and then have to go through all the coming out, all of the learning about how to navigate relationships, all the fear of all the very real and dangerous backlash, I can't blame you one whit for being suspicious or nervous about partnering with someone who is able to hide better. But please don't tell me I'm not real. [/quote]

+100[/quote]

Another bi woman with a +100[/quote]

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