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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Meet it head-on:

"OK guys, you know me, I'm a planner. Here are our plans for your upcoming visit. Here's a list of planned meals and food I'll have around as snacks. Here's a list of available kid gear. Please make your plans accordingly, and let me know if you'd rather do something different so we can all be on the same page."[/quote]

+1.  I more or less do this.  I don't know if my ILs are just not planners or don't want to appear like they're an imposition, but the bottom line is the same.  They never will offer suggestions on anything, nor will they even provide an opinion when presented with choices.  They rarely mention being hungry until it is already a meal time.  Now I just plan menu and rough plans ahead of time.  We'll accommodate/change if necessary, but for the most part they go with the flow.  Extra work in some ways, but way less stress in others.  Though, I will say, you should get used to the fact that somehow even with planning things will not go exactly as planned.  Over Thanksgiving, when I had already made plans for the aquarium including borrowing a larger car from our neighbor to accommodate everyone, MIL ended up last minute arguing it was all too much trouble and blah, blah, blah.  No, too much trouble right before we're leaving and have already told the kids our plans would be coming up with an alternative and assuaging hurt kids feelings.  More recent visit, and ILs just refused to get moving for the day because "they so rarely talk to DH", despite leaving me to cook breakfast for 3 kids and deal with them literally bouncing off walls because we've already promised them an outing but their grandparents don't want to leave or stop monopolizing their uncle who needs to drive.[/quote]

Why does visiting have to include outings?  Seems like they just really want to visit their son. Do the outings when they aren't there. [/quote]

They brought a 6 and 8 y.o. with them for a week.  They will go stir crazy without outings for that long, as will my toddler.  Don't bring little kids if you don't want to leave the house.[/quote]

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