Reply to Tell me about your teen getting to the other side of depression and/or suicidal talk?

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm not sure I'd say that we've come all the way to the other side, but we've come a long way.

My 17 year old's struggles seemed to start pretty abruptly in 8th grade, although in retrospect there were whispers of problems earlier.  He's diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder (now in remission), Generalized Anxiety Disorder, possibly Panic Disorder, and ADHD - PI.

Here are some things that have helped:

1) Psychiatrist and medication -- We hit the jackpot with psychiatrist the first time, and found the right medication (Zoloft) on the second try.  It took about 2 months to see results from the medication, and about 4 months before I began to feel like I had my kid back.  Since then we've adjusted it upward once when depression symptoms resurfaced.  The medication works well for his depression, and seems to control the suicidality, but has less impact on the anxiety.

2) Finding the right therapist -- We're on Therapist #4, a CBT specialist who only treats teens with anxiety, and feel like this is finally the right person. We stuck with person #2 for a long time, and in retrospect, I wish we'd made the jump earlier.

3) Finding the right combination, with sufficient intensity, of therapy -- right now kid's in individual therapy, and group therapy, and parents are in a parent group.  Once a week was not enough for my kid.

4) Prioritizing things that bring him pleasure -- When we first started to see behaviors like school refusal, and not doing work, that go with depression, I was pretty behavioral.  I know my kid's currency (attention from peers, sports, video games), and I cut these things off, saying "if you didn't go to school you can't go out with friends" or "no video games when the homework's not done".  I ended up with a kid under the covers on the couch doing nothing.  His isolation deepened his depression, which made it harder for him to be interested in the things that used to motivate him.

Now, we have a schedule, with sports, and therapy, and extracurriculars, and school.  If he misses something, we move on to the next thing in his schedule.  A day when he went to 3/5 things he was supposed to do (e.g. didn't go to class, did go to therapy, did walk the dog, didn't go to sports practice, did go to family dinner at Grandma's) is a better day than a day when he did 0/5 things.  He has a form, checks off the things he does and earns reinforcers for meeting a certain percentage of his goals.

5) Recognizing that his mental illness saps his stamina, and that he needs sleep and downtime more than most kids his age.  This has meant choosing easier classes, and slightly fewer classes.

6) Yoga/mindfulness classes have been a nice addition to therapy.

At the end of this, I have a kid who smiles and talks to family, who has friends, who goes to school most days and is earning passing grades, talking about college (probably starting out someplace he can commute and transferring),  is involved in sports and the arts, and who I can let out of my sight without worrying that he'll still be alive next time I see him.  From 2 years ago, when he was under the covers, not talking, not doing anything, and I was terrified each day when I went to work . . . That's huge progress.

Good luck![/quote]

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