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[quote=Anonymous]I think realizing that grown men might have a different idea of what "close" means than women.

My DH doesn't really do chit chat or family gossip. He isn't one to call someone on the phone to chat.  He's terrible at gift giving. But he shows up when it counts.  He spends quality time.  He's invested in his parent's well being and loves them.  I think he's really wonderful about helping them with anything they need, being present during health issues and in general being plugged into their lives.

My MIL likes to spend a lot of time comparing him to his sister, who lives closer and relies on her for daily child care.  So nothing he does is good enough.  He doesn't spend enough time, doesn't call enough, doesn't tell her enough.   She thinks he's not as invested in the family simply because he makes choices that are best for his current nuclear family (me and kids) and not best for HER.

However, he lets a lot of it roll off his back.  He loves her, he does his best, he knows that, so he sort of just lets her wring her hands about stuff and he just ignores it.  That drives me crazy, but I try to stay out of it like a good DIL.[/quote]

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