Reply to How to help 11yo son not cry?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am an easy crier, always have been. I don't think non criers really understand really understand the therapeutic value. You can't micromanage emotions like that. You just can't.  it's of physical, biological, hormonal reaction. It is not a weakness[/quote]

I tend to agree with you, but I find that if you cry when someone teases you, then [b]you are showing the other person that they have power over you. [/b] That's why I teach my kids to try not to let the teasing get to them.  I find that the more dc#2 reacts to the teasing, the more DC#1 teases.  Yes, I tell DC#1 to knock it off, but I can't always be there, at home or at school to protect my kids.  Unfortunately, it is a big bad world, and they have to learn to handle the teasing.[/quote]

So?  I mean, yeah, other people, especially people you love and admire, have the power to hurt your feelings.  If my husband or my mother were teasing me in a mean way, I might cry, too.  But maybe it's good for this kid's older brother to see that he is hurting his little brother.  Maybe he could stand to learn a little empathy.

Sure, teach the kid that one strategy for dealing with mean people is to ignore them or practice not letting them get to you.  But that is a long process for most of us.[/quote]

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