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[quote=Anonymous]History: I left home at 17, returned for about a year at 20, and haven't spoken to my mother since.

She has undiagnosed mental illness (would guess borderline personality). My childhood was marked my her alcoholism, moving ~30 times (different cities/schools), sexual abuse from a stepfather and stepbrother that she ignored, physical abuse, etc. I raised my much younger brothers until they were about 5, when I left home for my own mental safety. I went home the second time as she decompensatd and I thought I could help.

I've struggled to get to a better place in my life, and it hasn't been easy. I had a young marriage that failed (no wonder, considering my example of relationships). I've been fortunate that my career, if not we'll-paying, I am stable and well respected. I have a wonderful partner in my life for over 10 years, and we've just gotten engaged.

In the last few years, I've been able to develop a pretty close relationship with my brothers as they're now adults. Unfortunately, they talk to my mother about me, and now she is trying to reach me on FB.

Please help me steel myself to ignore, ignore, ignore. I love my brothers, and they love her, but their childhoods were vastly different than mine. Their early years were the same, but they didn't know better and I shielded them from the worst.

I don't want to hear from her, nor do I want them to tell her what is going on in my life. And for almost 20 years, I've managed to leave that all behind, move on with my life, get therapy, and do okay for myself considering my background. Now she keeps trying to worm her way in.

WWYD? Draw a hard enough and TELL her to go away, or just continue to ignore? Every time I see that she is trying to message me, it hurts, but I just can't go back again. I want to believe that she can change, but I'm also all out of faith for a woman I carried when I should have been being a child.

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