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Parenting -- Special Concerns
Reply to "Stepdaughter invited me to a Mother/Daughter event instead of her mom"
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[quote=Anonymous]Step mom here who has been involved in numerous situations like this with my SD. I guess it really depends on all the facts, but ever since my SD has turned around 9, I started noticing that she was definitely feeling rejected by the approach you suggest. The truth is, you're right that the "nice" thing to do would be to ask Mom first and that you realize you'd be hurt if the shoe was on the other foot. But the other truth is, at her age, she has a right to her legitimate feelings and if she wants you, then she wants you. What I've learned is that she might not understand, regardless of how well you communicate it, that you have a "good" or "nice" reason for basically telling her that her feelings don't matter and that you are rejecting her invite. I've gotten to the point where I just shrug and say "i'd love to go." It's now our job to police their every emotion and to force them to help smooth their mother's ruffled feathers.[/quote]
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