Reply to How TF should I have answered this?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, it sounds like your brother and SIL like to complain, not that they personally find you objectionable.  Let it go.  [/quote]
I agree with this!

[quote=Anonymous]Also, you live in the same city and only see them once a month?  Initiate more often, and then you can feel like more of an aunt/uncle to your new niece.[/quote]
But not this.

I don't understand why you continue to offer to babysit at all.  I recall a previous post that might have been from you --- not asking you to babysit, despite your experience, not respecting your accomplishments, etc.

I think all of you need to remember that babysitting is a favor from you to them.  If anyone is uncomfortable (you or the parents), then just don't do it.

To answer your specific question, in response to your bro, I would probably have asked: [b]Is there something in particular you want me to do with her?[/b]

But bigger picture -- I would not babysit again for the forseeable future.  It is obvious that no one can be perfect enough for these parents.  [/quote]

YES THISSSSS!!! That is a GREAT thing for me to say! Thank you, it's perfect. And I won't offer to babysit ever again. I've offered, the MIL has, my parents have, and they have reasons why none of us are good enough. Screw them. They can go hire a $20 an hour sitter in that case.

My mom made an interesting point. I told her I try not to be around my SIL much because she, since getting pregnant, has made some really rude and/or hurtful comments to me (which I said nothing to, because she was pregnant and then a new mom). And my mom said that my relationship with my niece is its own relationship, separate from my relationship with SIL. And I see her point. Yet, if they won't let the baby out of their sight except with the nanny, then no - my relationship with the niece is PART of my relationship with SIL. (A small part of me worries they will raise her to look down on me the way they do, and that makes me really, really sad.) [/quote]

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