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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]that is your BROTHER. talk to him. everybody just yes's him and so yes it's okay to abandon his son? that's horrible. he should step up. if he's been married this long, I'm sure his wife can learn to deal.[/quote]

OP here. I have had discussions encouraging him to do what it right. So have parents. The kids will eventually find out about each other - if not before, definitely at one of their grandparents' funerals. Just concerned that the kids will find out about it the wrong way. Also feel lots of sympathy for nephew, who really deserves to have the option to meet his siblings. But points to myob taken. [/quote]

PP here.  OP, you sound like you have a good heart, but this isn't your burden.  You can't  spare your brother the consequences of his actions or in this case inaction.   I have a little firsthand experience with this.  My dad had two kids I never met or knew about until I was 14. He had an affair that resulted in  2 kids.  He made it hard on himself, and finally just blurted it out because a well meaning relative like yourself kept insisting he should do it.  I I think it would have gone better if he had done so in his own time.

Like a PP said  just make sure you are supportive when it all does come out and in the meantime keep seeing your nephew.  That's it.  Everything else is for your brother to resolve with his children.[/quote]

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