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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I refused to go to couples counseling with a long-term boyfriend in the past. It was because I wasn't in love with him and had strong feelings/desires for someone else. (I hadn't ever done anything about it, but still, I was deeply aware that I had that broiling inside me.) I knew that I couldn't face therapy and not have these things come out and I didn't want them to. I loved my boyfriend as a person, as a companion, as a friend and didn't want him hurt with the knowledge that my physical desire for him was 100% gone and irretrievable. He broke up with me when I refused to go and I was relieved. And yes, ten years later I understand that the more loving thing to have done would have been to let him go. To have faced the situation more honestly. But there you have it. That's why I wouldn't go.

I actually know two people right now who are refusing to go to marriage counseling because they are each having a physical affair with someone else and are worried about being able to hide it.

I'm sure there are other reasons for avoiding it--including deeply ingrained cultural suspicion/unease/embarrassment over going to a therapist, but I'm guessing that [b]"having something big to hide" is a pretty common reason.[/b]

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