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[quote=Anonymous]I do not have a great relationship with my MIL.  She said some things to me before we got married, and was just a bitch throughout 
my wedding planning, and I just haven't really gotten over it.  I have tried, but every time I talk to her she makes some kind of comment that pisses me off.  
Anyway, one thing recently that has been bugging me is that the last four times I have been up to visit her, she has been unavailable to see us.  DH and I have four kids, and she lives 200 miles away, so this is no easy undertaking, and thre of the four we rented a hotel room and stayed for a couple of days, but she wasn't available to see even just DH for a meal.  A few months ago we moved, so our last visit at Christmas involved a flight, and we were there for nine days.  Part of that time, we were visiting friends And my family, but we didn't make firm plans with anyone just in case she could see us.   Now, I have seen MIL.  She comes to every child's birthday party or baptism and even drove 900 miles out to see us once.  
Anyway, I feel terrible that I hate her so much.  I really try not to let my husband know, and I do t want to mess up my kids relationship with their grandma.  I was talking to my mom about this making plans stuff.  Am I doing something to sabatoge this in some way?  My mom suggested that part of the problem is going through her to make plans.  That she is old fashioned and she might prefer to make plans through her boyfriend.  
Anyway, she texts me a few weeks ago and says that she and her boyfriend are getting married.  Perfect opportunity.  I call the boyfriend and ask when they are getting married because we would like to be there.  Two weeks from now.  In a Amal town without an airport 1200 miles from here.  Of course, we can't come.  So I suggested maybe we could plan a lunch with his family to celebrate sometime early this summer.  He then goes on to tell me three or four places he will be visiting his family this spring that are all still hundreds of miles away from here.    But doesn't really give me any contact information or suggestions that we could do a dinner or something there to celebrate.  Then he says, "Of course," he says, "it would be nice for MIL if you would come out here.  You have never even been out to the house."  
I just said that we would think about it and hung up.[/quote]

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