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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you move in with her, she's going to expect a ring soon. She will think this is obvious, but guys don't always realize this, so I'm telling you in advance.

As an organized, clean person, I couldn't marry a slob. [b]I'd spend my whole life picking up after them and them not even appreciating it.[/b] [/quote]

This is so huge and people don't realize it.  You're going to spend all your time tidying to YOUR standards and wanting the recognition from your s/o for doing it.  Meanwhile, they were fine with the mess so don't appreciate the work you did since, in their mind, you did it for yourself.  [/quote]

Completely agree with this.  Do not do it if you can't handle it.

I don't know how it is, but I'm a quasi neat-freak - always make the bed, pick up clothes, etc.  My siblings are uber-slobs - like...disgusting and embarrassing to admit we're related.  One of them has just had to completely remodel because of how badly she + slob hubby + 2 dogs + 3 cats + 2 children trashed it...and it is a 5k sqft. house, so it's not like they were pounding on a small space.

I also completely agree with the PP saying you need to have a blunt, direct conversation about this - NOW BEFORE YOU LIVE TOGETHER.  Now, while you can be completely honest and each have someplace to retreat to if the conversation goes poorly.  Honestly: "I could never live like this - I can't tolerate it".  Tell her it's a deal-breaker now so she can decide if she actually wants to accept that she's the one who will have to change on this if she wants the relationship to go forward - now, before any talk of actually sharing a place or buying rings.

DW and I differed on a few things - hard deal breakers - it was so much easier to handle these things in the early days (2-3 months in) than later.  [/quote]

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