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[quote=Anonymous]Two years ago, my mother and her husband (my stepfather) separated and she was forced to move out of their house into a small apartment. Her financial situation was dismal after one year offered to let her move in with DH and I for a couple of years to get back on her feet. She has her own bedroom and bathroom and has full access to the house while we are at work.  In exchange, she watches our 2yo 4 days a week. She also got a PT retail job and works about 15-20 hours a week. I thought this would be a great situation but it’s turned into a nightmare. Lately she’s been acting very depressed and it’s affecting everyone . She used to do a great job watching our daughter but hasn’t taken her anywhere but preschool in months. It’s always too cold, too wet, she’s sick, she’s tired, etc. Most of the time she sits on the sofa and watches TV.

The worst part of this is that she refuses to communicate with us. Yesterday, her car battery died at home and instead of asking us for a jump, she called AAA. Then, without mentioning it, she drove over an hour in the snow back to her old neighborhood mechanic just to get a new battery. After it was fixed, she proceeded to pout and mope around the house and complain about how much it cost and how she cannot afford it.

If I say [b]anything[/b] remotely critical she gets extremely defensive. For example, once when I had a friend over, she started taking over the kitchen and asking everyone if they wanted dinner (when I had already had out finger foods and snacks). I privately told her she was overstepping a bit, and she proceed to cry, claimed she was just trying to help, and locked herself in her room for the rest of the night. The next day she took take every food/cooking item of hers from our kitchen and  stashed it in a box in her room.  When I asked her about it, she acted confused and I ended up apologizing for making her feel badly.  I also know that she’s lied several times about very insignificant things (saying she fell on the icy sidewalk, telling us she went out to dinner with a friend when I know she was home). I’ve tried many times to ask if she’s okay, needs anything, but she always says she is fine and shuts down. DH and I are expecting our second child in April and our 2yo will be going to FT daycare. We had hoped she could provide some help with the baby but now I don’t even think I want her to be involved. She’s not prepared to move out on her own yet but it’s also not okay for her to live with us for free, especially in this state. Obviously, it’s causing a lot of friction between my husband and I. Anyone been through anything similar? What can I do?
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