Reply to If you've cut off a parent, what do you say to your kids?

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[quote=Anonymous]I come from a deeply dysfunctional and unhappy family, and I've struggled my whole life to maintain relationships with my mother and sister, both of whom are toxic and cruel. But my mom cut off her own mother when I was a child (for a series of terrible family incidents), and then my sister cut off my dad when she was a teenager (my dad is one of the kindest, most beloved people I know, but she transferred her rage at my mom at him). I've always sworn I would not set the example for my children that family is dispensible, lest they have to live with the same fear I did that they could be cut off at some point in their lives.

But lately I've been considering it again, more seriously. These are people who bring me a lot of pain and sadness, and never any joy. My mom doesn't even like my son (6), which I know because she "accidentally" cc'd me on an email to my sister saying he is an "unappealing child." She's already told me she's cut me out of her will, so it's not like there would be a loss there. I've shielded my kids from any negative impressions of my mom and sister, because I feel like that's my job as a parent, when they are too little to pick up on the really crazy stuff for themselves.

If you've cut off a family member, especially once your children know them already, how have you managed it? How have your kids reacted? Do you feel like it will have reprecussions for your own relationship with them?

Any advice would be much appreciated.[/quote]

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