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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There are many kids adopted internationally who do have living parents or other relatives--they may not be able to legally get their kids back after an adoption, but it certainly affects the ethics of the situation and could impact the way the child attaches to you.  Two bloggers with internationally adopted children who maintain relations with birth parents: http://www.livesayhaiti.com/2015/09/honoring-j-r-i-on-september-seven.html from Haiti and http://scoopingitup.blogspot.com/p/considering-ethiopian-international-or.html from Ethiopia

Similarly, if you adopt from a state like Utah, you're right that the birth mother may not be able to change her mind, but you also run the risk that the birth father was never notified and would have happily raised his child.  You get a kid, sure, but how is that kid going to feel down the road?

[b]I know it's hard to wait.  I am waiting to adopt right now, myself.  But being able to look my future child in the eye when he or she is grown and say I did things as ethically as I knew how, and was not afraid of his or her birth family, is more important to me than getting a kid asap.
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+100000[/quote]

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