Reply to If you have adult daughters, and you are close to them, how did you do it?

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Reply to "If you have adult daughters, and you are close to them, how did you do it?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree with pp about backing off on parenting after your kids leave for college. I'm in my mid twenties and my mom is my best friend, I talk to her almost daily. However, in high school especially senior year we did not get along at all, and both said some pretty horrible things to one another. When I left for college she REALLY backed off and made me feel like she trusted my desicions. It still took me a couple years after I left home to really have the great relationship I have with her today. She has always been a great listener and she makes me feel like no matter what happens she will always be there for me if I need her. We also both have a similar sense of humor and she is the only one I like to gossip with.[/quote]

Same here. My mom and I are SO close and so alike. I remember in HS just hating her for the boundaries, but now I wish there had been more. I would not have appreciated it at the time and I have no idea how to do that with kids (yet). She never said anything awful to me, she always told me that anything I did to "hurt her" really just hurt myself (threats of bad grades, etc.). She really showed me somehow that it would impact me, and I really did want to make her proud.

Then later, I was very independent in college and she told me how much she admired me (still does! She was impressed at my driving downtown today! It doesn't take much) and how much confidence I have.

So just build up your girls. Build them up, trust them, give them boundaries and then set them free...I guess![/quote]

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