Reply to If you have adult daughters, and you are close to them, how did you do it?

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Reply to "If you have adult daughters, and you are close to them, how did you do it?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm very close to my mom, though she can certainly get on my nerves and vice versa.  (She stays with us for a few months every winter and we are always excited to have her come and excited to have her leave).

I think my mom has a lot in common with some of the mothers other posters have praised above.  She was always interested in me and my sister as people (i.e., didn't in any way see us as extensions of herself), and seemed to find our view point and choices intriguing.  She always loved to listen to us describe our days, thoughts and feelings.  She and my dad were not model parents in many ways, but they imparted a strong sense of traditional golden-rule type values, though we were not religious.  She respected our need for space and independence, and supported us whenever we needed help.  We don't have particularly similar personalities as she's super-friendly and extroverted and I'm much more analytical and reserved.  But we always have fun talking and I value her advice a lot.

My daughter is still in high school, but I have a great relationship with her as well.  Like my mom was with us, I find her (and my sons) just fascinating.  I've made it clear to her that I think she's funny, smart and impressive, which I'm sure she appreciates on some level.  If I think she's not making the best choice on non-major things, I tell her why I have concerns based on my experience, but I try hard not to be too controlling.  She's very like me in some ways, but very different in others.  She is one of those kids who needs almost no guidance to do the right thing, which makes us feel very grateful.

I think having a good sense of humor and a strong interest in other people are important if you want to have a good relationship with your mom, daughter, or anyone really.[/quote]

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