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[quote=Anonymous]That's a tricky one.  My kids are bio-siblings, who were removed from their very young birth mom due to neglect.  They subsequently discovered years later that she went on to have another bio child who, presumably, lives with her, though she made no effort to reconnect with them.  They are furious and deeply hurt.  So no matter what you tell your DD, she will probably have a lot of pain over this.  A lot (though certainly not all) of adoptees struggle with a sense of shame---a feeling that something must have been wrong with them for them to have been relinquished.

I think you have to be very careful to answer only the questions you are asked, and avoid a tendency to give too much information too soon.  As she starts to process it, just let her know that any emotion she has about it is perfectly valid.  I am honest with my children that because they are adopted, they have a more complicated person history---with a lot of emotions that come with that.  But I also tell them that their complicated history has also contributed to make them the strong, interesting people they are.

What sounds so sad about your DD's situation is the loss of siblings.  She has a mom ---you---but not brothers or sisters.  Her bio-sibs may be the people she eventually wants to connect with the most.  [/quote]

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