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[quote=Anonymous]OP here...DH is saying that he will be going to counseling himself.  He would like for us to both go but he will go himself first.  More than a decade ago, he downloaded some illegal stuff.  He has not looked at that stuff since and he said before it was because he wasn't careful with his downloads back when the internet was not well regulated.  I trust that he has not looked at illegal stuff since more than a decade ago but I don't trust other fringe stuff.  He doesn't hide the fact that he looks at porn.  The reason I found he looked at weird stuff again is because I was opening up the MPEG4 player to play a cartoon for our toddler and what he looked at last night was preloaded and so I read the title.  The issue that I have is that he is addicted to porn and weird porn.  He came home last night and deleted all the porn he has and all the bookmarks for websites he would go to look at porn.  He said that this will enforce for him that he has an issue.  He also said that he will go to counseling to address his porn addiction.  He says he has been going through some rough patches and he feels lost and angry all the time.  He felt that if he did something devious it would relieve some of the anger.  I asked him why he would not go to counseling before doing something devious or why he would not just talk to me.  He said that he doesn't know why and he is very sorry that he f'd up again.

With respect to a support system, I don't really have any locally. My parents are out of state and I plan on sending my toddler to them temporarily while I figure out what to do.  What makes it worse is that I can't even fly to visit my parents and DS (my mom will have to pick up my son) because I have complete placenta previa so the doctor's has said that air travel is off limits.[/quote]

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