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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]She has always been self centered and lacked empathy[/b] - your words btw but you somehow think that magically as a teen she won't be that way?

You let her grow up to be this way and it was fine before because it didn't effect you directly. 
 [/quote]

Serious question -- is she this way because she's a sociopath, or has she simply been indulged her entire life?

Kids are challenging, and some are harder than others.  At this age, the answer is probably to start handing over some responsibilities to her.  She HAS to learn to manage her time between schoolwork and household obligations otherwise she will never survive in the real world as an adult.  How much free time does she have?  Start by curtailing that - no screen time, no phone, etc until schoolwork is done well and the requisite household chore is done on a daily or weekly basis.

If she said that to me at that age, my response might be "Um, no.  My job is to ensure that you have a roof over your head, clothes on your back, and grow up to be an independent adult.  YOUR job from here on out is to ensure that the house I provide is cared for, and the clothes are clean."  What household chores does she have now?  Time to come up with some and a plan of attack.  I have an only child who is younger than your's, and I realize that so often I do things simply because it's easier and quicker.  However, because I know that I don't want her to grow up helpless and entitled, I do have to force myself to lay out expectations for her with regard to contributing to the family.

Good luck.  You can change this, but it's going to take time.  Laundry is a great start.
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