Reply to Weaning your kid off a reward system

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wouldn't go to my job and work hard if I did not get paid.

Lower the reward to something you can live with indefinitely.  It make take a very long time, it may never happen.  It depends on the child.  If you get the improved behavior, then it is worth in IMO and IME.[/quote]

I see this argument all the time and I think it's a dangerous comparison. PP, do you ever do anything simply because it's the right thing to do? If so, this is the ultimate goal I think we need to be teaching children. Some material rewards for going above and beyond are fine: "You get straight A's, you can get (such and such)." However, I think kids should be given rewards such as going to a movie with a friend or family, getting a toy that is interactive,or going out to dinner with friends or family. This way, children, who don't appreciate friendships or the value of socialization much, get ample opportunities to do so while still getting a reward such as a movie, dinner, or toy. Many of our kids need less focus on extrinsic rewards and more focus on intrinsic rewards. Just an opinion. [/quote]

That is fine and dandy if it works for you, it is perfect world talk and I don't live in a perfect world. With many behaviorally challenged children, it just doesn't work that way and the reward system does.  Of course the longterm goal is for the behavior to happen without incentive, but it may take much longer than the norm.  [/quote]

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