Reply to This is why I keep some difference and just consider my husband my best friend

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]  Anyone relate?

My whole life until my 30s I had close female friends. A few friendships became unhealthy and 1 sided (e.g alcoholic friend crying to me over problems weekly, asking for favors and then going on tirades when drunk and being verbally abusive. I realized I had become an enabler and distanced myself.) Over time when I have dealt with enough of this type of stuff I decided my husband is the best friend who doesn't hurt me or use me and he is the person I trust and give my all too. I have female friends/acquaintances, but not close friends because I don't have much to give anymore. One of my kids has SN. My parents ae having aging issues, etc.

[b] Recently, I decided I shouldn't see friendship as a drain and I allowed someone to get closer and as soon as I did that it went from pleasant, but distant to her asking for major favors. She's not ill or in a dire situation. She just suddenly felt comfortable enough to ask me to do things for her and now I don't want to deal with her at all and I wish I had not let my guard down. I have to say "no" and if I had not given her chance I would not have to feel like a bitch.[/b]
 
    Anyone else find female friendships too draining to deal.[/quote]

What kinds of things. Because when yo consider someone a friend, it is not unheard of to ask them for favors. If she is not asking for a kidney, money, or for you to take her kids, how major could these things be?

Maybe you need to do some self-examination. Instead of focusing on what people TAKE from you, see 1. What you are willing and able to GIVE and 2. What you are willing to GET back. If the answer to 1 and 2 is nothing, then it is not other people. It is you, and you are best on your own.[/quote]

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