Reply to Eeyore daughter and Tigger Mom, achieving balance?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Stop trying to make her see the bright side. Each time you do that, you're dismissing her feelings. My mother is like this, and  then complains I don't talk to her. Well, I've been going through a VERY harsh time for almost two years, and her peppy comments just make me feel worse, and more alone, rather than better. I once said to her, "Just once, can't you just say 'Yeah, that must really, really suck!' so I know you're hearing me?" And she can't. So I don't talk to her.[/quote]

I've been through some very dark periods in my life (like high school), and in my experience, the unabashed "Tiggers" really were incapable of seeing/understanding that sometimes a person might know there is a "bright side", but be unable to reach it at the time.  There is NOTHING more irritating than a person who prattles and bubbles happily at you when you are going through a difficult time, urging you to "look on the bright side" or changing the subject back to rainbows and sunshine, and there are few things as isolating as being confronted by someone else's determinedly bright, brittle, everlasting burble of joy in response to a situation in which you really just want empathy and an acknowledgement that while the situation is bad, the other person understands and is there for you, and loves you.

I cannot abide the Tiggers in life, but I try to remind myself that they are this way because they haven't ever experienced real darkness, or because they aren't clever enough to achieve true empathy.[/quote]

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