Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "awful night with bf- any tips?"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My bf and I got into a huge fight last night due to our introvert-extrovert differences. I am slightly more extroverted than he is and although I need alone time to recharge after a social activity, I still need more interaction with people. After a long day at work, I want to come home, get a glass of wine and vent/chat with my bf. He is my safe place after a day out in the world. After a long day of work, my bf gets moody and grumpy and just drained. He gives one word responses, is tired and usually just wants no interaction with me. He'd much rather play a video game or read a book. I of course don't take this too well. As someone who loves me,[b] I expect him to relish the fact that he gets to see me at the end of the day and he should not want to wait to hang out with me and talk to me and tell me about his day.[/b] Last night, he was grumpy and quiet in the car, so I left him alone and we drove pretty much quietly after work. Once home, I had to get a job application out, so I was on the laptop and he got himself a glass of wine and a book and sat next to me and started reading. He'd rub my feet and read and I'd type away. After I got done, I went and showered and moisturized myself and looked over at him and he was still absorbed in his book. [b]I feel hurt that even though I was done with my task and I was free now, he still just wanted to read his book. [/b]He asked me how I was doing, I said I was okay. I then turn on netflix and[b] get quiet and "pouty"[/b]. He asks me whats wrong. I say its nothing. He asks again, I tell him that I felt hurt that he wanted to read his book instead of spend time with me since I was not going to be there tomorrow and the day after. He flipped out! And started going off a rant about how it is SOOOO unfair that I am begrudging him a book! I said I don't care if he reads his book and that I'm hurt he is doing it now when he could do it tomorrow or the day after when I'm not around. We go back and forth. He starts accusing me of not giving him any space to do anything except hang out with me and do stuff I want. I'm hurt I even have to ask him to spend time with me. He was yelling and saying all sorts of unflattering things about how I am so unfair and so mean! I then tried to sleep on the couch and cried until 2am. After which he came to get me and I finally went to bed. We were still arguing about it this morning. I am exhausted and can't focus on work. I feel like I have been through a war being attacked and criticized all night. :cry: [/quote] Grow up. Your boyfriend is an introvert. You know this, and yet you expect him to be different. Actually, you expect him to be like you. But he's not. No, he shouldn't have said mean things, but you need to either stop expecting him to be someone he isn't or break up. And FFS, stop pouting. Assuming you don't want to break up, you need to figure out how to build time for him into your everyday schedule. Not begrudgingly, not like you're doing him a big favor, but because it's what he needs to be happy. And then you figure out how to build in together time. But your needs are not more important than his. You have to really believe that, or this relationship is doomed. [/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics