Reply to Taking the plunge (adoption)

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm pretty sure you can't adopt two kids from China at one time (except twins).  I think you should reach out to an agency because there are a lot of rules.  You should figure learn about the rules now before you start imagining what you'll do.[/quote]

I'm not familiar with all of the country or agency specific rules yet, but I have done research into adopting and have known families who have adopted. It's definitely not an easy (or inexpensive) task.

[quote]OP - You sound like a great person, and well suited to adopting a special needs child. I would lightly caution you to consider, however, that the 6 year-old's needs will likely be much more serious than that of a child here in the States who doesn't have language. Consider whether you can handle the significant language needs AND the emotional/attachment needs AND the needs of a toddler.

Basically, I'd do one or the other (big kid or toddler) but not both.[/quote]

I know that it is possible that once internationally adopted children arrive in the US more health/emotional issues may come up. Fortunately the 6 year old has been hosted in the US, so he has gone to a doctor and audiologist in the US which might help. If I'm remembering right, China does not have as high of a risk for RAD as countries like Russia do but there will always be an adjustment/bonding period regardless of how old the child is.

If China does allow adoption of 2 children at once I'm not sure if it would be better to do both at once, rather then going through the process again in the future - kind of like having twins and getting the difficulty of the early years over with. I did nanny in college and have experience with multiple children at once (I once had 3 babies that were the same age as while as multiple kids of different ages), but of course that is very different then juggling work and 24/7 parenthood at the same time.

I feel like a big part of me is "ready" (emotionally anyway - financially is another story), but obviously I don't want to bite off more then I can chew.

The only person I've mentioned this to is my sister and while she's excited at the prospect she's the cautious one and thinks it's better to wait a few years so I can do x, pay off y, and complete z- but I think if I keep putting it off until I do xyz new xyz's will appear and it will never happen. My mom knows of my desire to adopt one day, but she's pretty old school and thinks I should wait and get married first but at the rate I'm going I will never get married (miracles happen, I guess). [/quote]

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