Reply to In laws never interested in our kids, SIL/BILs inconsiderate/rude

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[quote=Anonymous]Why do you like SIL and BIL? They don't sound very considerate. At any rate, are their positive traits and your commitment to being in their kids' lives worth the unequal relationship you currently have with them? If it's not - and that's totally reasonable - then you need to renegotiate the terms, knowing that it's likely that the result will be less presence in their lives in and the lives of their children. Scale back the invitations and stop babysitting for them. If they ask you to babysit, tell them that you can't but reiterate an invite to something that would involve them and their kids. Maybe they will shape up. Maybe not.

There's nothing you do about DH's parents except give up on the idea of the kind of relationship you want with them. You have no bargaining chips here because they really don't care.

In general, I'd suggest not doing things that make you feel taken advantage of. They can't make you hold up an unequal part of a relationship. They may not even be noticing. If you stop, you will be happier. But if you decide doing your part is worth it, even if it's never going to be reciprocated the way you'd like, accepting that you are doing this of your own free will and you can stop at any time may make you feel better about it. [/quote]

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