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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I found my ILs' visits a lot less annoying and a lot more helpful once our first was a little older and then we had a second kid.

I echo suggestions both to 
a) push visits off from all of them a little longer so they are a bit more spaced out, because you do want time as a nuclear family after all
b) lower expectations of how clean the house will be, etc, when they come and 
c) enlist them for help when they are there. Whoever's parents it isn't should get a hair cut or do some of there kind of errand/activity that is easier to do alone when their ILs are there.  Also you and DW should go out on a date![/quote]

(b) and (c) are how I deal with it.  If I don't feel like I have to roll out the red carpet and put my life on hold when my in-laws come, I enjoy (or at least tolerate) their visits so much more.  If they were the kind of people to insist on that kind of treatment, we'd have a problem, but they don't, so now I just clean the bathroom, change the sheets on the guest bed, and figure out what errands I can run while they take my kid to the park.  They enjoy their visits, and I don't feel like I'm being put out every month.  As a result, I'm willing to have them visit much more often.  [/quote]

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