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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There will be a million opinions.

Generally, you should go to the service if you are going to the party, but sometimes life doesn't work out.  I was very understanding about sports conflicts, myself, but I appreciated the parents who asked me point blank.  I always answered: this is a joyous occasion for us, and we want you to share the joy any way you are able.  I appreciate you talking to me about it, though.  Kiddo, go to your game.

I think boggle is a bit immature, but a gift is a gift and is fine.  Most give cash.  Multiples of 18 as is appropriate for your income.  You don't have to give in a manner appropriate for the family receiving.  You don't have to "cover your costs" like some say about weddings.

Services: depends on the denomination.  As far as "sneaking out" --yes, you can slip out, but you should say something to the family.  The kid won't do most his stuff until the second hour.  Many people are late for services.  People can but rarely leave early.

Enjoy the year. It is fun.[/quote]

In Conservative services, people often arrive late -- the part where the child is featured is at the end.  So, people stay until the end.  In Reform temples, the child typically leads much of the service, the service is shorter, and it would be rude to arrive late or leave early.  In orthodox, you need to attend the entire service.

As for the party, if you are only going to attend the first hour of the party, let the host know.  It might reduce the number of meals required.[/quote]

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