Reply to Anyone divorce your spouse just because of lack of sex?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have not divorced but think of it daily. Logistics make it tough so playing the waiting game. Have not had sex in five years. I have asked to go to counseling but she refuses. Minimizes impact - tells me that I make a big deal out of not having sex. So, as others have suggested I am working on myself. Will likely start to go see someone (counseling) by myself just to deal with resulting anger issues.

I know I have stopped being a nurturing spouse. She will want to talk about her day, vent about work, have me help her get her car serviced and frankly I couldn't give a shit at this point. But I cannot say that I have divorced but I will not choice to live the rest of my life this way and I am making financial and personal plans to ensure separation.

I have told her that I view the withholding of all physical affection as a violation of her vows. It doesn't seem to sink in; when I tell her we need to go to counseling in order to avoid divorce it doesn't sink in; in our marriage she has often refused to discuss things so that she can say "we never talked about that" but in my kinder moments perhaps she is just wired differently, that we both need to recognize that, and plan accordingly.

I need to be careful though because I do find I get very angry and need to watch my tongue in front of the kids.

In my case it is the nastiest form of passive aggressive behavior I have ever experienced. And I think she will be genuinely surprised and saddened when I file but that's not a marriage. Well, then again, I realize now that for alot of women, marriage is a financial contract.[/quote]

Oh my god. I need to show this to my husband, who turns into a jerk after 2 weeks. Five years? Nothing? I hear people throw around the term "sexless marriage" but I had no idea people actually went this long. What does she say? Does she give a reason or has she been saying she's not in the mood for five years? Sorry to be so blunt, but I'm shocked by this. That is not a marriage. Is there any intimacy or affection at all? Do you cuddle or spoon at all? I hope you guys find some sort of solution. You shouldn't have to be in a marriage with that sort of refusal. [/quote]

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