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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]When I am myself, they think I'm out of touch with reality and don't understand them[/quote]

Don't project.

They don't have the same experience and they mention it - like, "parents wouldn't have had time to read a book to their kids". They are stating a fact. Just view it as such, that's all.[/quote]

OP here. [b]Well what do you say to that[/b]? "I'm sorry?" All I wanted to know was "why?" If it was my family, I would have asked and we would have discussed it, but they're closed mouthed about so many things.

We've been married for 5 years and I've known them years before that too. I often keep my mouth shut. But [b]they think I'm quiet and bitchy[/b] because of it. Whereas I'm actually very outgoing with lots of friends. We don't watch TV (no time) and they don't understand the things we really do enjoy.

I actively dread visiting because I feel like a different person. [/quote]
I would say something like:  Wow, sounds like they really had it rough. (if they want to add more detail, they can or that can be the end of that topic).  Or, you can say something like:  Oh, really?  What kinds of things did they like to do when they had time? although that is a direct question so if they don't like to share (maybe it was a difficult time period or that is their personality, then it could be harder for them.)  I would try to to go with a response that acknowledges their experiences and allows further conversation if desired.[/quote] I'm PP, but I am also wondering how you know this to be true?  Does your husband tell you?  Or are you assuming?  If it's your husband, he should know that he does noone any favors by passing along opinions like that and if it is you, you might want to examine your assumptions and figure out if you could possibly be projecting or misinterpreting.  But you know what?  If you are yourself and they don't like, it would be ok.  [/quote]

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