Reply to Unmarried and Separating with 3 Kids - 50/50 financial responsibility?

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[quote=tharlan]My fiance and I have decided to split. Our relationship moved very fast, got pregnant with twins after only 5 months of being together, and now after almost 8 years together and 3 wonderful kids ages 7 (twins) and 5, we have decided to call it quits. It's my decision mostly as he is completely committed to the relationship, but I haven't been emotionally connected for at least a year (lots of reasons why through history of relationship) and feel that we've been operating as robots. We've been going to regular therapy for the past 9 months, and I feel that we've both put in a good effort, but I still do not feel the love or emotion towards him that I know he wants and deserves.

He makes $105k/year and I recently quit my full time job (we both agreed on this) where I was making $79k/year to pursue my own business, knowing that it would take a few months to build up a regular salary, and I would need to bring in at minimum $2500/month for us to be comfortable still covering all expenses. I took $7k from my business to put in to our joint savings as "back up" money in case I ever fell short of that $2500/month min.

We have planned to live in the house together until possibly next summer when we may put the house on the market for sale, and we're trying to be as amicable and "normal" as possible for the sake of the kids until one (or both) of us does move out.

We've always pooled all of our finances together as a family, we have no debt, and we own a house together. This is very recent so the only changed we've made so far is that he's moved in to the guest room, but we are trying to now establish our "boundaries" and "rules" and set forth a regular schedule of who's responsible for what.

He wants to split all of our monthly expenses and responsibilities for the kids 50/50, and approached me with a budget spreadsheet showing what that would look like, but I do not feel that this is very fair, and I am seeking advice on what options and/or rights I have as an unmarried parent. He makes much more than me, so covering half of our family expenses is easy for him along with having his own money to save. I, on the other hand, would really have to hustle to make up my half and maybe eventually I'll get there with my business, but it is not guaranteed at the moment as this is my first month doing it full time.

Any comments, suggestions and advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!
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