Reply to 'closed' adoption agencies

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Reply to "'closed' adoption agencies"

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[quote=Anonymous]I just want to say how appreciative I am to see a few posts acknowledging that adoptive parents can have some degree of preference in terms of knowing what works best for their family.

Yes, adoption should always put the best interest of the child first but if the OP knows that open adoption wouldn't work for her family, then isn't it in the best interest of the child to be honest about that now and seek a match with a birth parent who shares a preference for a closed adoption? That doesn't mean they wouldn't be open and honest early on with their child about adoption and may even support the child's desire for a meeting as an adult but if they don't want contact after birth and there are birth mothers who feel the same way, what is the harm in requesting this?

Research shows that open adoptions work very well and this happens to be the type of adoption I am currently pursuing.  But closed adoptions can also be successful for all involved. The OP shouldn't be judged for specifying a preference.  I get a bit tired of this "beggars can't be choosers" attitude that's often thrown at adoptive parents, like their feelings shouldn't matter at all.[/quote]

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