Reply to Unreasonable to limit MIL visit over holidays

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. DH is perfectly fine with the long visits because he just ignores his mother. I've tried to explain that it effects my work days and end up looking like the bad guy. MIL is partially helpful but oversteps ALL. THE. TIME. She will put the 1 year old in bed with her. Let the older two wake up at 5 am to start playing. Will Feng Shui the house when I'm not paying attention (hang crazy stuff up, moves stuff around without permission). She'll cook but leave a huge mess in my kitchen. It will take me hours to clean up. After she left in May, it took me 5 hours to deep clean my small kitchen. It's so much extra work. I've asked to limit the trip to Thanksgiving only and reserve Christmas for my out of town family (my stepfather is dying of cancer and I want/need to be flexible if my own mother would like to visit). [/quote]

Hotel.  [/quote]

Good idea. Also this is DH's mother. This person is primarily HIS guest. This woman wouldn't be visiting you unless you lived with her son!
Therefore, she must be primarily HIS responsibility.
He must set ground rules. 
-Kids sleeping locations and times are set. She does not change them
-Furniture arrangements, wall hangings are set. She is not to move them.
-She leaves a mess in the kitchen? HE CLEANS IT UP.

Also, you have my blessing to pick up and leave this nonsense with or without your husband to go visit you own family, including your dying stepfather, for Christmas.

Ugh. My sympathies, OP. You really need to sit down with DH and work this out. Good luck.
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