Reply to S/O Reality of marriage for late 30s woman

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to get yourself (and him) to therapy. Good luck.[/quote]

We were both in individual counseling and marriage counseling for a while.  He didn't want to do marriage counseling and, as hard as fitting it into my busy schedule was, I gave up on dragging him there after a few sessions.  He is in a real rut.  Separate and apart from our marriage, I worry about him as a person.  He hates how he looks, hates his job (I hate mine too), and has totally failed as a husband.  He keeps saying he knows he needs to make a change, but then after a week or so of helping out more, he'll go back to being content to let me bear most of the family responsibilities.  He thinks I should be happy that he brings home a good check, and a lot of men think this way, but this isn't our parents' era.  Women work just as much as men now, so what good is just a check doing me?  I made it clear from day 1 that I wanted an equal partner and would, in turn, not just quit my job and stay home the way some women do.  DHs who refuse to help out on the domestic front are betraying their vows just as much as DWs who refuse sex.  The two often go hand in hand.  Why would any woman want sex with a man who is like another liability?[/quote]

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