Reply to 1st world problems- sick of schlepping

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As someone who has done the schlep for years: does anyone out there really think the schlep is worth it?[/quote]

We're in the early stages of schlepping and I already don't think it's worth it for us.  Son is 4, has some quirks, and according to the dev ped his only diagnosis will be AHDH impulsive (not inattentive). Looking at my family history, we were probably all in this category.  But my family is all gifted, had great attention for school, and though we have some social quirks, we've all generally been popular and well-liked and successful.

But every time we talk to an expert, there's some new-fangled therapy that we're advised to follow.  First it was OT (waste of time), now speech (unrelated to his ADHD - related to his major hearing loss from fluid), and now the words floating around are more OT, therapy, social skills groups....

The thing is, my son is exceptionally well-behaved when he's calm and low-key.  I work and my husband travels all the time, so the idea of hauling my kids to three simple therapies a week from preschool is crazy stressful - for me and for him.  I have pretty high confidence that my son will end up okay either way. Therapy may theoretically "fix" some of his issues. Or therapy may just resolve them earlier than they might have in the absence of intervention. But if we don't do therapy at all, worst case is that we suffer through some tough preschool years while he works out the kinds, and then he's a little off as an adult (like 95% normal) but still smart and successful and well-liked. So all this stress now -- which literally makes him worse on a day to day basis by escalating his stimulation, but has the potentially to help him long term.... I think we're going to slowly back away from this whole process, implement common sense parenting that we see helps, and just wait if/when his elementary teachers insist we get him help.  [/quote]

I've been there. If they recommend a therapy with little if any research supporting it, I just simply say we mostly stick to empirically validated treatments. I get all different opinions, talk with as many parents as possible and make the decision that works best for us. We feel ST has been well worth it. OT can be worth it, but I found it more work to find a good OT than it is to find a good ST. Some of the OTs we encountered were wackadoos who seemed to need more help than my child did with things like executive functioning, anxiety, etc or they seem like they missed the classes on child development. Some offenses we have experienced include introducing toys that are for age 10 and up for a 4 year old or giving an 18 month old toxic markers and then saying it's NBD when the kid puts it in her mouth. There was one therapist who gave pipe cleaners to our then 2 year old who proceeded to stab herself multiple times and cry. That said, there are good OTs and we do feel they have helped.

Social skills group is a waste at age 4 for our experience. Kids are still so open minded so IMO you are better off getting playdates. My child has learned so much from kids with good social skills. When we tried social skills groups the negative behaviors seemed to be contagious. One time we were told our child was the model and yet we still had pay.[/quote]

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