Reply to How to handle a (hopefully) temporary separation period?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]Anonymous wrote:
Oh honey. I'm so sorry you are going through this.

First thing first, OP. Get that infant into daycare. aYou are going to need it anyway when he's gone and it will take away the whole I'm a SAHP thing pay me extra support and alimony your DH is (likely) going to pull when you are in a divorce proceeding. Second, get good childcare because your children are being cared for by a pothead. That doesn't bode well.

Third, you need to get to an attorney asap. They will give you a road map to follow to protect your assets and children, including what type of documentation would be helpful in a child custody proceeding.

Finally, go to therapy. Alone. You need to take a beat and look into how you can be the most stable caregiver for your children.

+1 on infant daycare. A guy who is high everyday doesn't get to be a stay at home dad caring for a 7 month old. If there was some accident or illness and your 7 month old had to be taken to the ER by his high father, you could lose custody of your child even though weed is legal. And you wouldn't necessarily be viewed as a reliable caretaker either since you are knowingly leaving your infant in the care of someone who is high everyday. (Same could happen if drunk parent showed up at ER.)

Consult a lawyer about the care of an infant by a high parent and document.

Thanks to you both. I am actually a lawyer (not family law, but I know enough to know my way around). I'm meeting with a divorce attorney next week and researching childcare options for my 3 yo and 7 mos old now. He claims he doesn't get high or smoke during the day, but I don't believe him. He claims this is just at night after me and the kids go to bed.

Also - anyone have any sense of how much 4 grams of weed is and how much a "regular" person smokes at once? Due to my childhood with an addict, I definitely shied away from any drug use in college and all my friends were drug free too.[/quote]

I'm the first PP in this thread. Again I'm sorry you are going through this and being an attorney you know more than others how ugly people can get I'm sure.

I wouldn't focus on what or how much he is or is not doing. I would spend every ounce of energy you have building a solid plan to leave him, including setting the stage for primary custody. Your children's safety is the first priority here.[/quote]

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