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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here,  The problem is that she is planning on flying here it seems just to see us.  That seems like a lot of pressure if I was only willing to meet for one dinner.[/quote]

Adult child of despicable parents here:

--You don't owe anyone your pain
--Anyone can purchase a plane ticket.  It is a contract between her and the airlines that doesn't bind you or your kids. 
--Narcissists, borderlines, and psychopaths use material things (in this case a plane ticket) and unilateral actions (in this case, coming to DC uninvited) as a way of roping normal, decent people into their sickness.   
--Your answer is in your heart:  If she hadn't purchased a plane ticket without your request or consent, you'd have no reason or inclination to see her. 
--Take your family to a nice dinner together and celebrate that you have built something that's not based on guilt, manipulation, and craziness.

Repeat often:  no one can require me to feel pain.  No one can purchase access to me and my kids.  I survived, I moved on, and I do not need to look back.  [/quote]

Excellent advice. OP, print it out and read it frequently.[/quote]

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