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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Read:  How to talk so teens will listen and listen so teens will talk.

Not sure it will help much, though, you seem pretty set on setting her right.  You will NOT get anywhere by calling her out.

Strongly suggest thinking differently or it will be a long and destructive next four years.[/quote]

OP here. I understand and realize that something needs to change. But when I see dd walk into a room full of friends with a grumpy look on her face, sits by herself, and complains later that they were ignoring her...what would you say to that? I'm not being snide here. I really want to know how I am supposed to react![/quote]

I would sympathize with her feelings, and then instead of telling her how it is, I would ask questions to understand better how it is. Right now, you're jumping to conclusions -- you see a grumpy look and friends ignoring her, and you're assuming the answer is that if she lost the grumpy look her friends wouldn't ignore her. But maybe her friends started ignoring her earlier, and the grumpy look is because she's now anticipating/anxious about the ongoing exclusion. Or maybe she was legitimately unhappy about something and was hoping to get some support from her friends but they didn't respond. She is the one in the middle of the situation, and it's important to respect the fact that she may know/understand things you don't. A simple, "I'm sorry, that sounds awful. Why do you think they did that?" might get you a lot further with her.[/quote]

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