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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I learnt to just be a chameleon with mine. I tried not to offer my opinion or bring up anything. Everything I did was wrong in her eyes anyway. I gave less info and she had less ammunition. It confuses her. It's been almost 30 years now. The first 10 or so were so horrible. I tried so hard and was so stressed and hurt. She's older and mellowed a bit.[/quote]

OP here.  This is us.  Nothing I say/do is right!  I don't really try (that I know of) - but (and this will rub the opposite types the wrong way - or raise more semantics criticism :) ) - I am positive by nature, and I think it bothers her, because she is quite obviously depressed.  In my case, MIL is definitely getting worse with age.  On the one hand it is sad, on the one hand, she is hell bent on hating (or as she would put it "not liking" - same thing to me :) ) - me. 
[/quote]

OP, as long as you behave like an adult and are cordial and polite, what does it really matter if she doesn't like you?  Yes, it would be ideal if she did, but she obviously can't get past her own crap to do so.

[b]You need to treat her like a colleague whom you don't really care for and whom doesn't really care for you. [/b] All the advice of "Cut her off," is nonsense b/c unless someone is a lying, thieving heroin addict, it's not really practical to cut them out of your life completely.[/quote]

NP. I am working on this. I hate being around MIL. [/quote]

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