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Reply to "Cousin asking strangers on the street for directions? "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I like to appear confident and poised when I'm walking in a city environment. But part of being confident and poised is asking for directions when you don't know where you are going (I know that YOU did know where you were going, OP.) I truly don't understand how you would be scammed from merely asking for directions.[/quote] It wasn't a fear of being scammed. It was annoyance that she refused to simply read a street sign, a small map, go out the correct entrance from the subway so we were on the right side of the street or closer to our destination. And she wouldn't say excuse me to the people she was asking. [b]She looked scared, panicked, and scattered.[/b] [/quote] OP, if you are close enough to this cousin to want to travel with her (at least, to think you wanted to travel with her before she showed how anxious she is)....If you liked her enough to plan this, and do it, then please follow up and see if you can help her get some help. Has she traveled much before this, or was it her first real trip outside her own local area for a long time--or ever? Has she had stresses or changes in her life recently (and "recently" might mean the last few years, for her)? In the past, did she perhaps travel with someone else, a spouse or significant other, who is no longer in the picture, but who might have been horrible at travel planning so she trusts no one, even you? Or maybe she has had some bad travel experience of which you were unaware? There could be a lot of reasons, sad and painful ones, for why she was like this on the trip. If someone you care about is looking "scared, panicked and scattered" on what is supposed to be a pleasant vacation -- she needs support and possibly some professional help. I would try to focus less on my annoyance (and you do indeed have good reason to be annoyed and angry!) and maybe try to step back from your own reaction, justified as it is, and focus more on the idea that she might have emotional issues that are behind the annoying behavior. Yes, she could just be a pain and a bad traveler. But she also could have been just overwhelmed and trying to grasp for some control by asking, asking, asking for directions. Sounds like someone struggling to gain what feels like some control as she begins to panic. And you can't reason with panic, even if you say "I have a map here, I have directions." Sounds a lot, in fact, like my aunt by marriage who gets like this when she is off her psychiatric medications and starting to crash and become anxious.[/quote]
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