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[quote=Anonymous]First of all OP, I sympathize with your situation.  You are absolutely not an ogre for doing what is right for your immediate family first.

Who runs the finances in your home?  I know I am going to get flamed for this suggestion, but is there anyway you can keep some money away from your husband so he doesn't know you have it?  Otherwise it is going to very difficult for you to deny his requests when it literally comes down to either helping parents pay for treatment for a life or death illness or a keeping a room over their heads (immediate emergencies) versus saving for retirement or your child's college (abstract, non-immediate needs).

Also, I know I will get doubly flamed for this, but your immediate family should be both you and your husbands first priority.  It appears your husband may be placing his extended family first and if that is the cases, you should evaluate if you want to continue in this marriage.  It also may be helpful get an outsider opinion and speak with a therapist as well.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.  [/quote]

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